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Posts Tagged ‘The Heinous Cat’

Apparently, the garage door need only be open for 4.78 seconds for The Heinous Cat to sneak inside unnoticed.

He is up to his dark and underhanded tricks again.

Last Saturday, I was bustling around getting some thing done outside that sorely needed attention and was in and out of the garage as well as our storage shed.

After going back in the house and  finding 38 more things that needed done all at once, I finally ran back out to the garage for something and there sat The Heinous Cat on top of a new bag of cat food, claws sunk in like he was going to rip that bag to shreds if someone didn’t get it open for him soon.

Once I got past the surprise of finding him in the garage and on top of the bag of food, it registered that he was sitting there lecturing me.

“Hey, You, come open this thing for me. What’s it take to get some food around this place anyway? I should turn you in for neglect. Are you listening to me? Let’s move it. Hungry cat. Come on. Open, open.”

I point out that there is a bowl of food waiting for him out back as well as cat food in a dish right there in the garage.

“It’s a little stale. I want the fresh stuff. Could you hurry it up?”

Yeah, those are the types of conversations the cat has with me. He also throws in lines like, “That big guy you let stay in the house with you. Yeah, he forget to feed me this morning. What’s up with that, anyway?”

The cat lies. A lot.

Captain Cavedweller feeds the obnoxious cat before he feeds himself breakfast. It’s part of their routine. Cat gets fed then human.

The Heinous Cat – he thinks he suffers so.

Anyone want a cat with a bad attitude and no courage?

She Who Has Learned to Tolerate the Cat

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Drooley

Drooley, aka The Heinous Cat,  has been off adventuring again.

Only instead of coming home with pieces of his ear missing as he usually does, he came home limping.

The good news is, nothing is broken. The bad news is that whatever he did has caused him to go temporarily insane. Even worse than usual.

I’m telling you the little fuzzy dude has been nibbling loco weed.

Drooley has several places he likes to laze around our yard. Behind the lilac bush, in the chair by the front door and sprawled across my petunias are three of his favorites.

Since he came home injured, he has taken to hiding in the most obscure places, like burrowing into my lamb’s ear bushes, crawling under a pallet and climbing on top of the patio table. All that activity is strange, to say the very least. But the thing that has let me know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he has lost his marbles is the fact that he let Miss Maizy, aka The Interloper, get close to him and rub her head on him. A previously unheard of event that normally ends with him swatting her so hard she either falls over and runs away.

I’ve said it before and I know I’ll say it again, but this cat is just one odd little duck.

She Who Will Never Understand This Cat

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