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This weekend my beloved Captain Cavedweller will turn the big 4-0.

As in middle age.

As in over the hill.

As in not quite as old as me, so I better stop now.


I may have mentioned it once or twice, but I kind of like this guy.

As in love him with every fiber of my being.

As in completely and totally crazy-in-love with him.

As in he makes my heart melt on a daily basis.

Anyone who knows us, knows Captain Cavedweller finds it difficult to be serious… about anything. He loves to tease and laugh and joke. Quite often at my expense. I can come home after a hard, challenging day and he can have me laughing hysterically before I quite know what has happened.

He has a gentle way with little old ladies and kiddos that is to be admired. He has yet to meet a cat, dog or any fur-covered pet that he didn’t like. The feeling is usually mutual.

He lets me be me, loves me unconditionally and surprises me daily with his encouragement and generosity. No matter how off-the-wall it might be, he listens to all my ideas and buoys my dreams while helping me keep my feet on the ground.

Captain Cavedweller is one-of-a-kind and I know I am very, very blessed to have him in my life.

And if the landscape of my life looked a little different, I would love to have half a dozen little boys at home that looked just like this.


Happy 40th Birthday, melter-of-my-heart,  my very own Captain Cavedweller!

She Who Adores You

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Driving into work the other morning, I was surprised to see someone stacking hay with a New Holland Stacker. Not too many farmers still put up the small bales, opting for the one-ton or round bales.

Seeing that stacker and the bales took me right back to the summers of my childhood.

My dad grew hay and wheat and corn on our farm. When it was haying season (which happened three to four times every summer) even I got called upon to help.

When I was little my “help” was riding along with dad on either the swather or the baler while he worked. A few times I was allowed to ride in the stacker, sitting on a little tool box between the seat and the control box on the opposite side of the door. My mother had an overwhelming fear that I would fall out of the stacker and be pulverized before my dad knew what had happened. Her fear was not without some merit.

According to family lore, my dad, brother and a neighbor drove to California to get the hay stacker back when I was too young to remember. They bought it and drove it home on the freeway. Unlike most of the farm equipment that never goes terribly fast, the stacker was capable of speeding right on down the road. When my brother Kim operated it, speed was definitely used. As he drove from the field to the stack yard, dust would fog behind him like a tan other-wordly vortex. My dad didn’t drive it quite so fast, but he still managed to make the dust fly.

I think it was the summer I was 15, my dad decided we could get the hay stacked a whole lot faster if I rode along with him on stacker and jumped off to turn up the bales that weren’t sitting upright. Sometimes when the bales come out of the baler, they would roll to their side and the stacker can’t pick them up that way. It was my job to go along each windrow and make sure every bale was straight and lined up, ready for the stacker.  I usually did this by riding my little Honda 110  up and down the rows, turning over the bales that were flat and having a great time.

On this particular day, though, my dad decided I should keep him company in the stacker. So as he drove through the field picking up bales, I sat on the edge of the open door, watching for flat bales. When I saw one, I’d jump out, run over, turn it upright and then run and jump back into the stacker.

This worked great until Dad hit a badger hole and I fell out. Envisioning my meager little world coming to an end under one of the huge tires, I was completely surprised when Dad managed to barely avoid hitting me.

I think Dad was even more rattled than me. He made me scoot as far back in the stacker as I could, fastened the safety bar across the door and didn’t let me out until he left me at the end of the row near my motorbike. As I started the bike to finish setting up the flat bales,  he called out “remember, don’t tell your mother.”

That’s one secret we’ve kept all these years.

She Who Will No Longer Jump Out of Moving Farm Equipment

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The other day our neighbor’s dog, Stinky, decided to come over for a visit. She hadn’t been over for a long time, and it was nice to see her.

I found a stick and tossed it for her to fetch so many times I thought she might wear a path through the jungle-like grass that is currently our backyard. It was somewhat surprising to discover she slobbers even more than the Heinous Cat which made tossing that stick somewhat challenge for someone with an elevated “Ewww!” factor.

Drooley (aka) The Heinous Cat

Speaking of the Heinous Cat, as soon as the dog appeared, he came rip-roaring up to me and stood with his fur on end, tail swishing and eyes narrowed. Deciding he could take a dog 10 times his size, he growled and took off after Stinky.  The dog, however, thought the cat was playing and ran around yipping happily then turned and tried to chase the cat.

The cat threw on the brakes and beat a hasty retreat behind me.

This activity was repeated no less than a dozen times when the Heinous Cat’s other mortal enemy, the interloper, arrived on the scene.

Miss Maizy

She made a dash for a corner of the back patio and took refuge there, hoping to ignore the dog and the crazy cat.

Tiring of their game, Stinky, flopped down on the patio, slurped up the water in the water dish and prepared for round two.

By this time, both cats and jumped on top of the patio table and sat cowering together.  It was one of the  few times I’ve actually seen them willingly get within striking distance of each other without striking. Sitting close together, you could almost hear their conversation… “If I jump on her back, can you take the head? I think we can take her down. Come on, let’s show her who’s boss.”

The dog barked, the cats yowled and ran off toward the lilac bush for cover.

I threw the dog her slobbery stick and decided I’d had enough fun for one day.

She Who Kind of Likes the Stinky

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This past weekend I gathered with the above group of wonderful women for our annual getaway.

We started this tradition a few years back at as a one-time get together. But we enjoyed it so much, it has become something we all look forward to each year. Last year, I highlighted our past excursions as Gallivanting Goddesses.

This year, we added my cousin’s fiancée to the group and she had the misfortune of rooming with me. I hope she has by now recovered.

For my part, though, I loved spending time not only with her, but the rest of our group.

These women know how to laugh and cry. They know how to offer encouragement and support. They know how to tease. And they really know how to shop.

A lot.

As we packed up our cars and prepared to head our separate ways toward home, we were already discussing plans for next year.

I think we all look forward to it and just enjoy that special time we have to connect, relate, and deepen our bonds of kinship and friendship.

No matter if you gather with one or a dozen, whether they are family or friends, I think everyone needs a special weekend now and again to reconnect, to grow, to just be.

She Who Loves This Group of Amazing Women

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